Monday, July 30, 2012

Why I Would Not Have Made A Good Pioneer

Road trips are long and tiring.  Here is a brief summary of our epic drive to Utah.

Friday, July 27

5:30 PM  Jerry's estimated departure time.

6:30 PM My estimated departure time.

8:35 PM  After a full day of work for Jerry and a full day of cleaning for me we finally rolled out of town in our filled to the brim car.

9:36 PM The first time that I looked at my clock and thought to myself "Oh my gosh, it's only (insert time here)"

10:14 PM The time that we decided to give in and get a motel room.  We had planned to drive for four or five hours. We thought crashing in a motel would be better than crashing the car.

10:30 PM  The time the we literally fell into our bed.

Saturday, July 28

6:35 AM I mistook the hotel hand lotion for hair conditioner.

6:47 AM I forced Jerry out of bed.

6:55 AM I put one butterfly sock on wrong side out and didn't notice for about six hours.  I didn't fix it either.

7:15 AM  After a scrumptious (READ: completely unsatisfying and unhealthy) breakfast at the motel, we hit the road feeling pretty good about ourselves.

7:15 AM - 12:00 PM  We enjoyed the last views of Alberta.  (Canola field, cows, hay bails, canola field, cows, hay bails, canola field etc.)

10:30 ish AM  We stopped for snacks in Fort McCloud.  I insisted on buying carrots.

10:30 AM - 12:00 PM We scarfed down the carrots because we remembered we may not be able to take them over the border.

12:00 PM - 1:15 PM  Border and customs.  Better than expected actually.

3:15 ish PM  Jerry's roadside nap in Montana while I tried to break into the outhouse to use the restroom.

3:15 - 7:00 PM  We enjoyed Montana's striking mountain views.  Craggy hills and deep ravines with rivers make beautiful scenery.

4:30 PM  We dug a gift card out of the trunk of our car and used it at the Macaroni Grill.  Protein and vegetables were a nice change of pace.

5:30 PM You know you are in a small town when the gas station convenience store is already closed.

7:00 PM  Are we there yet?

7:35 PM  "My back hurts, my feet hurt, my arms hurt."

8:30 PM  We start making up goofy songs about our surroundings.  We were in Idaho so the only thing we had to go on was hay.

10:15 PM  I realized that saying we're almost there in Pocatello, Idaho is a bit misleading.

10:15 PM  I fed my husband Chicken Caesar Salad while he drove.

11:00 PM  "My back hurts, my feet hurt, my arms hurt."  I try to sleep, I am not successful.

Sunday, July 29

12:30 AM  We hit traffic in Utah in the middle of the night.  I curse road construction.

12:45 AM  Still stuck in road construction.  Jerry tries to block people from cutting in line.

12:50 AM  Are we there yet?

1:15 AM  I hadn't realized we had already passed Salt Lake City.  Now it is safe to say that we are almost there.

1:45 AM  We park in front of my sister's house.   We leave everything but our purses and wallets in the car, and find our way to bed.

Please, do not suggest a road trip to me for awhile.


4 comments:

Haamlette said...

Really, we're just a few hours south. Not much further.

Joe and Joanne said...

Oh wow girl -- that is a looooooong trip. I hope your back, feet, arms, legs, butt - and whatever else might have been compromised is feeling much more rested. Your description of Montana has me wanting to visit it now. I love natural scenery and it sounds like that state has a lot of it!

So, are you moving to the same city as Jenn or are you on your way to another end-destination? Glad you made it safe! Will keep the eyes on the blog! ;)

Eric said...

Fresh produce across a border is always frowned upon for some reason.

So, why was it 1.25 hours to cross? I usually get across in 30 minutes or less, even if they flag me for not looking normal enough (plus I never seem to have an acceptable reason for crossing).

What part of MT did you drive through? 93, 6, or 2? You should have made a detour through Glacier NP at this time of year...

You only went about 100 less miles than Nauvoo to SLC. That was a 4-month trip in the 1800s at roughly 10 miles a day. Most people walked almost the entire distance, even if they had a wagon and oxen or mules (which most did)...

Rich and Kim said...

Painful but fun to read Michelle. Glad you made it safe and sound. Can't wait to chat one of these days.